When I was single, dating as a trans woman was often difficult. Finding the guy wasn’t the problem. Keeping him once he knew my truth was.

There was one wonderful relationship in college that stayed with me throughout my 20s. I carried it with me through years of dating, imagining what it would be like to run into him again.

The “what ifs” and the “what could have beens” turned into a kind of romantic-fantasy that kept me up at night. I compared every new connection to him, hoping that one day we would reunite and everything would finally make sense.

In my mind, the conversation would go one of two ways. Either he would confess his love and we would find our way back to each other, or it would be awkward and I would leave in tears.

When I finally did run into him, it felt like I had manifested it. But the reality of the conversation was nothing like the one I had rehearsed in my head. It was uncomfortable, dull, and I was indeed left in tears.

That experience became the foundation of ALMOST.

What stayed with me most was not that I saw him again, but that the conversation I had lived with for years never arrived. That absence became just as meaningful as the encounter itself, raising questions about how much of closure exists in reality, and how much lives inside us.

So often, people are left without closure, and it can consume them. We convince ourselves that if we could just say the right thing, or hear the right response, we would finally be free. But the truth is, if something was meant to work, it would have, or it will find its way back in time. The question is whether closure is something we receive, or something we give ourselves.

ALMOST is a four-minute dramatic film that explores the emotional space between memory and reality, capturing the quiet power of self-reflection, unresolved love, and the courage to move forward. It’s about the moment where manifestation brings you face to face, but the conversation does not arrive the way you imagined. In this film, I wanted to write a version of the conversation that never happened. I wanted to place the power back in my own hands.

At the same time, this project represents a turning point in my career. In an industry that often asks artists like me to wait to be chosen, I’ve decided to choose myself. I’ve set out to make my own work, to stop waiting for the right role, the right opportunity, or for others to understand who I am as an artist.

Making ALMOST was not about proving I could do everything, but about trusting myself enough to start. To follow my instincts, embrace imperfection, and allow curiosity to lead instead of fear.

I’m committed to continuing to change how trans women are perceived in film. I’m creating the kind of on-screen representation that I needed growing up: a beautiful trans woman who is confident, reflective, intelligent, and desired — a woman who has been loved, who will be loved again, and who is not defined by heartbreak, even when it hurts.

Being a first-time director while also serving as actor, writer, and producer was incredibly challenging, yet absolutely thrilling. By the end of the shoot, I felt deeply affirmed that this is exactly what I am meant to be doing.

Like all filmmakers, you simply have to start. Even if it’s small. Even if it’s imperfect. Even if it’s just you, an idea, and whatever tools you have access to. To make something. To begin.

This film allowed me to see the artist I am, not just the artist I could be. To stop focusing on my potential and instead actually prove myself. Prove that I can carry a vision, communicate it, lead a shoot, bring a story to life, and see it through.

From reshaping an earlier version of this story into something more manageable, collaborating with my co-star and crew, to learning new technical skills, building platforms for my work: making my first film was a complete labor of love.

Thank you to everyone has shown me love and support over the years, to my collaborators who helped bring this vision to life, and to those who have followed my work since my blogging days. I hope you enjoy the film and continue with me into this next chapter.

ALMOST is just the beginning.

This film marks the start of a new era for me. So here’s to everything I have yet to learn, and to the many dreams still yet to come true.

Stream ALMOST here!

xx

Corey Rae