June 2018 Reflections
June was another monumental month for the books, or my blog rather. June is always filled with fun stories and has always been a month of growth for me; being my birthday month, Pride month, and the official start to summer.
Beginning with my birthday on the 3rd, I’ve felt surrounded by love and good people this month. On Friday the 1st I did a photoshoot for an IG account about Pride. On Saturday the 2nd I had brunch at my favorite spot and celebrated at night with both close and new friends at my favorite bar in LA, Davey Wayne’s. Akon, the rapper who’s song “I Wanna F*ck You” (which was my 7th grade ringtone - followed by Natasha Bedingfield’s “Unwritten,”) had a table next to mine and we started having a casual conversation. One of the models he was accompanied by asked me, “So are you a woman that used to be a man?” Instead of getting angry, I sat down next to her and told her I wanted to educate her. I started off by saying she should never ask someone in that way or tone again about their gender identity. She was quick to defend herself, arguing that she’s just very blunt. I told her there was difference in being blunt,( I myself am very much so blunt), and being ignorant. I then talked to her about transgender and gave her my story and typical spiel. At one point she kept interrupting and Akon turned to her and said, “Shut up and let her talk.” She then let me finish before apologizing for her actions. At the end of our conversation AKon got up, and hugged me, and thanked me for being so open and sharing my story with him and tat it taught him alot. We then took an epic group photo which i posted to IG.
On Sunday the 3rd, my actual birthday, my grandparents came up from the desert, took me to my favorite Vegan restaurant, Gracias Madre, and then I went home and watched movies with my bff turned new roomie.
What I learned from my birthday is that I am loved, and knowing I’ve found good hearted people in LA which makes me feel good. I had no expectations for my birthday weekend, and it turned out to be incredible. I went into my 25th year looking and feeling my absolute best, which I wasn't’ expecting at all. Most people have said I’d have a quarter-life crisis during my birthday weekend, but luckily I only had a minor breakdown on the morning of the 1st. I will admit it was over something meaningless that spiraled. I had gotten a low amount of likes within the first hour of my post and got upset over it. My solution? A phone rant with Turner, pulling myself together, and going on a hike at Runyon Canyon. I got into a Lyft Line on my way home from the hike and talked to my driver and the model next to me about my morning meltdown. They both gave me sound advice, I need to separate me self value from IG and things that I know I want from myself and it’ll be good for stress. I couldn't have agreed more, and I am now trying to work on making social media less about validation through likes and more just showcasing how I really am day to day, and letting everything happen as it should. That mentality helped me to take on 25 and carried over into Pride weekend.